I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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