Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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