Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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