Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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