At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
