Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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