omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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