Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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