Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
