Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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