whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
