:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I'm gonna fight the coyote
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
