More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize