Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
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