So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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