I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
