he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
So I just went to clothing optional bar
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize