please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
meet me or not, i'm out of control
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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