Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
