you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
it's great music for shaving your balls
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
