addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
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