I cockslap morals
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Randomize
