if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
