I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
