I accidentally had phone sex last night
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
