Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
