PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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