ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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