I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
