dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
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