wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
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