You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
