1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
