I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
