at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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