wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize