he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize