she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
