You work out of a Hotel?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
How external is "for external use only"?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I believe in your delicious
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
