what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
