If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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