Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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