And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize