If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
