it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
