i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
