Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
You've changed since you got that strap on
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
