butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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