? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
