can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
